Late Night TV

So there's a tornado watch out right now. It's 1am. And I'm up. Still.

Been a long day today...preparing for my move (a little, ok?), worked my eight hour work day, the standard.

Thursdays always seem to be a little long for me. I'm usually not into bed until 12 or so after visiting with Blue online. But tonight’s a little later for me.

(THUNDER)

So...I got to thinking...bout this whole storm thing going on right outside my sliding glass door.

First of all...I love storms. Give ‘em to me. I'm kinda a weather geek of sort. I dig this stuff. Too bad Corey took the camera with him to college. I'd get some GREAT lightning shots tonight.

But back to the storms.

You know, when it comes to these kind of events, lots of people are caught off guard. I mean, have no real plan. Living here in the Mid-West, it's tornado country. We usually get the standard 8-10 warnings a year, this year being about the norm, I suppose. But still, people are always caught not being ready.

Not having enough batteries. Or a flashlight that works. A radio in case of power outage. General stuff.

Not me. I'm decked out in FULL TORNADO WARNING GEAR (picture it, Skip!). Got my boots on, my BatMan utility belt, my surf board (in case of flooding).

Seriously, though. Time for the parallel. Ready?

When you KNOW that there is going to be severe weather in your part of the country...like EVERY YEAR...why on earth can you not be prepared for it?

The same ideal is true about your relationship with God. And end of times.

Are you ready? Got YOUR utility belt?

I ready. Hope you are too. =]

Just some after 1am ramblings. You get the message.

Ok...off to stand in the rain. In tribute to Chill's video today. Love ya brother!


Love. Peace. Harmony.

Bryan

My Son, My Hero

And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you


My son and I have a very unique relationship.

I have always allowed both of my children personal freedom. What I mean to say is that I never "push" beliefs or circumstances on them. I give them the freedom to choose what paths they want in life. Of course I am a responsible parent. I never would put them in danger or harm. But just the same, I've always felt that the best of life's lessons are learned through personal successes and failures. And believe me, they have experienced both.

"Sure, son. You can stay up and watch television. Just know that 6:30 am comes early. And you CANNOT miss school under ANY circumstances."

You get the gist of it.

So - the reason for this post.

My son was a believer in Christ. Throughout his childhood, he was always the first one to volunteer for anything. Spending time at the soup kitchen. Helping children faced with adversity. You know...too good to be true. But he was.

When he "graduated" from 8th grade, Corey won almost every award there was to win. Best in Science, Best in Math...I'm here to tell you...it was getting a little embarrassing hearing my son's name being called every five minutes to come up and receive his award. While it WAS gratifying, I started to feel a little sorry for the other students. I'm sure you can't blame me for feeling this way.

But the MOST important award he won that night was "Most Christian". Corey and my daughter Kirsten went to Catholic school. So with this being said, the Bible and His word was a part of their everyday life. And my son practiced it. Everyday. (BTW - my daughter does, too...)

Then Corey's freshman year started. He was doing very well at his Catholic high school. Straight A student. With a personality even! Teachers and students alike loved being with Corey. And Corey LOVED high school.

One day during late Winter semester, Corey came home with a pain. One that's very difficult to explain, but I will try nonetheless.

Corey hurt in his testicles. Now, if you a man reading this...you immediately doubled up.

The pain was intense. He often described it as if someone was constantly kicking him there. I'm having difficulty even typing this, because I can only imagine the feeling. Which would be extremely uncomfortable.

He was diagnosed with Epididymitis. Which is an infection in the tubing of your testicles. I began to learn so much about a mans body immediately. I wanted to help in any way that I could.

What I did learn, is that there is no cure for his type of Epididymitis. He would have to learn to manage the pain. I tried everything. From alternative medicine (acupuncture, message, aroma therapy) to standard medicines (morphine, anatryptaline, et all), nothing was helping. He lay awake all day and night, and all I could do was hold his hand...and pray. Which, of course, I did.

Corey went through 6 ultrasounds. 3 MRIs. And two trips to Oklahoma City to see a doctor that had treated several patients with the same disease. This doctor started a case study on Corey.

Through all of this...I started seeing Corey lose something that at one time was a staple in his life. He started losing his faith. At least on the outside. I can remember one specific night waking up to him crying in the living room. It was about four in the morning. And I overheard Corey asking God "Why?" He was 14 years old. He was wanting to die. He repeated it over and over. "Please take me!" "Why me? I've been so good!" "I want to die right now!"

I held him. I gave him his pain killers. I gave him the anti-depressants the doctors prescribed. He finally went to sleep.

This went on. And on.

So I had been going to this support site, looking for answers from other men who suffer the same fate. Men of all ages. I had been posting Corey's story for the rest of the world to see. And to get a little comfort from the outside world.

Since only about 50,000 men worldwide suffer from this, there is not enough support from the medical community, nor the pharmaceutical community to put funding into research. So many more men suffer today. But not my Corey.

You see...I had been praying all this time. And one night, an email arrived from someone who had seen one of my posts. This gentleman had the same condition. And found a doctor in Chicago who had performed a microsurgery on him. One that was not a published one. It was trial and error. And the man had been cured. With little side-effects.

I felt I had nothing to lose. So I talked to Corey about it. He agreed. And two surgeries later...his pain was gone. Every now and then, when stressed, a little bit of the pain comes back, but my son is back to living again.

For the nearly three years he was bed-bound, he lost his high school. He lost his social life. And I thought he had lost his faith.


I kept praying.


So in the last year (since he's been cured), he's managed to graduate from high school, and was accepted with scholarship to Ohio University. He is studying Music Production. And I know he'll do well. I'm so proud.

All of this time, I never told him not to lose his faith. I mean, I continued to pray for him. Of course Jesus is a part of my everyday life, and I was always around my son. I secretly hoped it would maybe "rub-off" on him. LOL

My son calls me everyday from college. Our relationship is unique. We are best friends. Other fathers are envious. I don't blame them. Maybe it all goes back to the "making their own decisions" thing. I don't know.

So today, my son called. As usual.


He told me he went to a Bible study today.


I'll let that sink in.


Yeah. It DID feel good. Didn’t it?

Corey told me that he never lost faith. Ever.

Then he thanked me.

For not "pushing" him too hard. And letting him come back to Jesus on his own.

It's easier to take ownership in something when you're not forced to do it. And I always knew he'd be back. Now he is.

Bless you Corey.

Thank you for making me so proud of who you are. And where you've been. And where you're going.

You're my hero, Corey.


I love you, son.


Pop

The latest and greatest!

I can hardly believe how much time has gone by since the last time Bryan or I wrote. Especially me!! So much has gone on this summer and we haven't shared any of it with you. Let's see, my boys (Joshua and Jonathan) spent the month of July in Georgia with my parents. Kirsten (Bryan's daughter) got to spend 3 weeks in Georgia with Bryan's sister Suzy. I got to take a week off and spend it with my guys in Georgia before I drove home. While I was there, I got to meet Kirsten and Suzy and Hannah (Suzy's daughter) for the first time!! It was incredible! It was like we had know each other forever! The next weekend I flew back to GA. for our multiclass reunion which was awesome!! Bryan and I decided NOT to have a big wedding but rather to get married on the beach in Georgia with only our immediate family there. And of course, Chill Pastor will be officiating!! There was never any doubt about that!! And we set a date: March 29, 2008. Yaay!! I can hardly wait! I think that gets it for June and July. Now for upcoming events!

School starts for both Kirsten and Joshua and Jonathan on the 27th. Kirsten will be a junior, Josh will be in 8th grade and Jon will be in 4th. I'm not real sure what classes Kirstie is taking or if she's ready for school to start back, but I do know this...she is one smart cookie and I know she's going to have an awesome year!! I am seriously hoping that Joshua will decide to show what he is truly capable of and not have another year like last year. It was a constant battle!! Josh is taking a couple of cool electives (spanish and theatre arts) so hopefully he'll enjoy his classes a bit better. Jonathan will be at a new school this year but he's very excited. We found out who his teacher is the other day and he's excited about going to open house later this week. It's a brand new school so he's anxious to get inside and snoop it all out. Bryan's son, Corey, leaves for Ohio University on the 30th. He is psyched and ready to head out on his own. Bryan is getting a little sentimental about his son heading off to college but is very excited for him. Corey wants to be a record producer which I think is very cool!! Music runs deep in the veins of the Poindexter men!!!

Bryan is moving to Pearland the first weekend of November. 77 days and counting!! I move into our new 3 bedroom apartment at the end of September so I have a month to get it ready before he moves in. I can not wait to begin my life with Bryan. He is such a God send. He has so completely changed my world that I can not even begin to express the love that I feel for him. God knew exactly what and who I needed in my life and I am thankful every single day for the blessing of Bryan. He loves the Lord with all his heart and he shares his faith and the Lord's leading everyday. He is amazing and a constant example of who I want to be!! Hopefully, he'll be along soon and share a few of his insites. I love reading what God places in his heart to share!!

I hope this finds you all doing well. I plan on not being gone so long. I'm going to just start writing whatever is on my heart and try to keep y'all posted on the latest happenings in the Poindexter/Toruno family. I send my love to each of you.

Until next time.....sweet dreams and God bless you!!

Anybody Warming Up Down There?

Ok so last night Bobby Cox calls for Bob Wickman in the ninth to "nail it down" for Tim Hudson. Huddy pitched a GREAT game against the Twins. 7+ innings. 3 K's. 1 walk. 2 hits. AWESOME. I've been concerned lately about Timmy. His last few outings were a little less to be desired. But he seems to have gotten back the form he had from earlier this season. Whew!

So, anyway. Blue and I are watching the game together. I still sit in amazement that she is a Braves fan. On top of that, she really knows her stuff! Every game we watch together, she'll say something that girls are not supposed to say while watching a Braves game.

OTHER GIRL - "YAY! He threw the baseball, and that other guy with the bat hit it!"

MY BLUE - "Man, if Francoeur would just go with the pitch, he'd have a sure double off the right field wall!"

OTHER GIRL - "Do they sell peanuts at the game?"

MY BLUE - "Bobby needs to intentionally walk this guy to put a force on at second. Watch, he'll do it.

OTHER GIRL - "That guy's cute!" (NOTE - Blue SOMETIMES qualifies for this entry as well, but for the sake of this blog, I exclude her from this statement)

MY BLUE - "I'm so glad Chipper's back from the DL. The lineup really takes a hit without him in it."


You get the point.


So - we both see Wickman warming up in the eighth when I say to Blue...

"PERFECT! WICKMAN'S UP! I CAN'T BELIEVE BOBBY IS GOING TO THROW THIS GAME AWAY!"

Blue, the eternal optimist (you have to be if you wanted to survive through the 80's as a Braves fan) says to me..."NOW YOU JUST QUIT IT! He's pitching much better. He really is! He’s gonna come in, and nail it down for Huddy."


...right. (Insert smart-alick sound effect now)


The banter goes back and forth throughout the entire 9th inning. Blue and me. Back and forth. She's starting to get a little upset at my demeanor. Seriously. I can tell. But I had to keep it going. After all, he WAS blowing the save.

One out and six batters later - the save was blown. Just like I had predicted. yay. go bravos.



Sigh.



Now that a few hours have passed...I got to thinking about the game last night. And how we can look at what happened and apply it to how we live our life everyday. (I'm like that. Sometimes it drives people "batty", but whatever...)


Life throws us "curves" everyday. Sometimes we need to "take a pitch" to see what the offering is. (I can't STAND it when Francoeur swings at the first pitch...AUGH!) It's too easy to judge folks and situations these days. We look at how people dress, act, speak, etc. and automatically decide whether or not this is acceptable to our lifestyle. It's too easy to fall into that trap. But we all do. Sad but true.

I posted earlier about the clothes I wear. Sometimes, people look at me and decide really quickly that I must not be a man of God. This is SO untrue. Just because I act/look the way I do, doesn't mean I don't follow the Book.

And to tie this up into a neat little bow for you...

Cox will bring Wickman in again tonight probably. They face the Indians (Wickman's old team) in Cleveland. Wickman will get another chance to save a game. Just like all of us. We get a chance everyday to be saved...and sometimes we blow it. Sometimes we don't. The coolest thing about God is he continues to give us a chance everyday. And just like Bobby Cox won't lose faith in Bob Wickman, God never loses faith in us. He'll keep calling for us in the 9th. This is ULTIMATE! Some people consider this job security. I call it Job ( http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Bible,_King_James,_Job ) security.

So it's our responsibility to "get ahead in the count".

"My love is strong enough to last when things are rough"

Love. Peace. Harmony.

Bryan

It's been TWO MONTHS?!?!

...seriously. Wow, talk about dropping the ball. I've pulled a Bill Buckner.

Just remember this...

Bill Buckner was a career .289 hitter (not bad) that led the National League in batting in 1980. He was an All-Star in 1981. And led his league in AB/SO Ratio four times! I could go on, but you get the point, I'm sure.

So much to catch up on...so little time. Work beckons (ewww). As the months creep slowly towards summer, the national Pepsi intake index grows. Which always means my work week grows.

Growing with Pepsi is good and bad. My arms grow. This is good. My paycheck grows. This is good. My ego grows (because I'm the BEST 2nd shift merchandiser in the city...YAY ME!). This is good?

My back pain grows. This is bad. I see Blue a little less. This is bad. I spend less time with my younguns. This is bad?

So, with this being said...it's been a really busy time for me the last couple of months. I know, I know. This is no excuse. Considering the life my pal Chill Pastor leads everyday, he still gets his Blog done. I have no excuse. I'll do better.

So last night me and Blue are chattin'. You know, talking Love. Money. Music. Braves. We HAVE priorities, you know? We've been into this discussion over the last few days about my face. Now when you read that, you freaked, right?

I've had this patch of fur under my lip for sometime now. I can't even remember when I started growing it. I don't grow facial hair very well. I'M STILL A MAN, though. Just have a few defects. Don't we all? 'Cept Chill. And Blue. Ok, now I'm getting too soft....

So anyway, Blue tells me that she kinda wants to see the old Bryan. The one from DHS. Of course, there is NO possible way I could ever give her that wish. I weighed 130 lbs. dipping wet. Drove a beat up VW Beetle (UNC blue, btw). And was ALWAYS a member of the FP. You know, the Fashion Police. Right. (Insert laugh track now, please)

The ONLY thing I could do to "try" to grant this wish, is to shave my "soul patch". Something that has grown very near and dear to me. It's a part of me now. For a while. And I like it. 'Cept the streaks of grey/white in it. That part is TERRIBLE. Other than going to the local Krogers and buying some Just For Men (from the leader in men's hair coloring), there's really nothing I can do about that.

So Blue's gotten to the point of being so tired of hearing me complain about the grey, she suggests shaving. Making my face nakey.

Um. no.

THAT LASTED. five minutes.

So I got myself up from my chair. Went to the bathroom. And ShAvEd.

Now my face is nakey. I have to admit it’s a weird feeling. But I kinda like it.

My kids think I look younger. This is good. There's less time grooming in the morning. This is good. Blue's kids don't care one way or the other. This is good. OH -

Blue likes it. This is GREAT!



Insert Job 6:29 Now. =) (YOU have to look it up. Gives you an excuse to grab that Book for a change)



Ok...so I'm off to work. Yay. The new/old look ready to tackle the world. Wish me luck. My face needs it.

By the way - did I mention that I asked Blue to marry me?

I love you Pup!


Bryan

Matthew 18:35

What do you do when you get hurt by someone? Do you want to hurt him? Do you want to hold it against them? If you said yes to these questions, you are like most folks. Forgiving is something that is unknown to most people.

Why don't people forgive willingly? Here's why, because it is easier to dislike than to forgive. Some people think forgiving is a sign of weakness. It isn’t. To forgive takes courage and extra effort!

So, what is forgiveness? It is a present from a charitable heart. It is not a reward. It is not something that you give to someone based on his good behavior. It’s what you give a person regardless of whether he has deserved it or not. Whether the person has asked for it or not.

Forgiveness is not an occasion, which starts and ends when you say, "I forgive you".

Forgiveness is an act which often takes time. The deeper you’re hurt, the longer it sometimes takes to completely forgive. It is not just the words you say but it is your actions which will show if you've really forgiven.

Why is it necessary? Because it frees you from the weight of resentment and hatred. It takes massive energy to hate and to keep that hate in place. Forgiveness brings freedom whereas revenge is neither sweet nor rewarding; it’s just a hollow feeling.

Hate puts needless stress on your body. It is a well-known fact that anger and hatred can actually make you sick. So many people in the world today really don’t belong in a hospital, because the root of their problem is not physical but is mental. The moment they forgive and let go of their hate they will start to get well.

Another reason why you need to forgive? By not forgiving you actually prevent blessings from flowing to you. The Bible says that before you pray for anything first you must forgive those who have wronged you, and then your Father will forgive you your wrongs. Blessings are closely connected to your forgiving others.

I used to be very cynical about life. I never forgave effortlessly. And at the time I also struggled in every area of my life. Things didn't seem to work out for me. It was as if everything that could go wrong, usually did.

That was until God told me to take a look at my mind-set. I started to forgive those who had wronged me, and everything started to change for the better. It didn't happen immediately. It took a while, but I could tell a difference.

So how do you know when you've really forgiven someone? If after you've forgiven that person you continue to feel a negative sting whenever you think of him or her, well, that means you still have effort to put forth.

If you don't have negative feelings towards that person it means you are free!

Are things not working out in your life, even with you doing all the "right" things? Is it possible that you have reluctance to forgive in your heart? It’s something to ponder!


Get Together



Love is but the song we sing,
And fear's the way we die
You can make the mountains ring
Or make the angels cry
Know the bird is on the wing
And you may not know why
C'mon people now,
Smile on your brother
Ev'rybody get together
Try and love one another right now
Some may come and some may go
We will surely pass
When the one that left us here
Returns for us at last
We are but a moments sunlight
Fading in the grass
C'mon people now,
Smile on your brother
Ev'rybody get together
Try and love one another right now
If you hear the song I sing,
You will understand
You hold the key to love and fear
All in your trembling hand
Just one key unlocks them both
It's there at your command
C'mon people now,
Smile on your brother
Ev'rybody get together
Try and love one another right now
Right now
Right now!

Look At Us...

When I laid my tired aching bones down for slumber last night, a reoccurring thought continued to fill my mind. One that I'm sure everyone has shared at least 100 times in their life.


Who am I, anyway? (BESIDES Blue's boy!)


Pretty deep, eh?


I mean, we ALL have a special purpose, right? (Insert your favorite Steve Martin "Jerk" line now)


Some people teach. Some people become nurses or lawyers (not ALL are dishonest, I promise!). Thank the garbage man next time you see him. What a stinky front yard you would have without his help! In any case, the stark reality hits us all that we should grasp what our “role” in this world is, and try really hard to make the most of it! Trust me; I live this certainty almost daily while I'm slinging Mountain Dew two-liters up on the shelf for you to take right off behind me! EEEGAHD! HMPH!


“Take a good look, friends, at who you were when you got called into this life. I don’t see many of ‘the brightest and the best’ among you, not many influential, not many from high-society families. Isn’t it obvious that God deliberately chose men and women that the culture overlooks and exploits and abuses, chose these ‘nobodies’ to expose the hollow pretensions of the ‘somebodies’? That makes it quite clear that none of you can get by with blowing your own horn before God. Everything we have--right thinking and right living, a clean slate and a fresh start--comes from God by way of Jesus Christ. That is why we have the saying, ‘If you’re going to blow a horn, blow a trumpet for God.’” -Paul



We all have diverse starts in life as Gods kids. And one thing is perfectly clear in all of this – no matter what environment you come from, or what part of the planet you were born into, or what religious affiliation you belong to - we all make the fabric of a worldwide quilt. And what’s more, ponder this...


We ALL can end up with the same eventual conclusion. It's our choice. Free will is awesome!


Now, for even more coolness! With all of our differences of belief, with all of our unlike ways to celebrate God - we ALL live by a common "thread".

Do Unto Others...


So why do we grow apart as a community?


I’ve always been perplexed by the term “Holy Wars”. Maybe I’m showing my simplistic nature, but to me, this statement is such an oxymoron. I mean, by being “holy” do you not want to live as God lives? Saintly, perhaps. Or having a spiritually pure quality about yourself? Then “live and let live”, I always say!


And take this a step further. Why do so many churches feel the need to “recruit” new parishioners? Is this the Army? A Division One basketball program? A job placement service?


Try this one on for size. Do you know folks that regularly “shop” for the right church to belong to? Are they looking for a three bedroom, one and a half bath community?


Sorry, I’m rambling. But I’ll try to come full circle to an opinion of mine that no one has yet to convince me otherwise. Too many churches today have become clubs. Social get togethers for an hour or so, once a week. “I better be on time, because so and so might see that I’m here this week”. Peace be with you.


Over my lifetime, I’ve experienced a number of different religious organizations. From Baptist to Catholic (talk about different ways to celebrate!). And you know, through all of my experiences – through all of the different communities I’ve been a part of, I’ve become more and more aware of essentially the same message. I have faith in the Lord. My Lord, your Lord. One in the same. And I’ve never wavered from my conviction. I believe in OUR God. And I thank Him everyday. I bet if you brought together seven or eight different people from seven or eight different churches, and told them NOT to tell you their religious affiliation…a great many of us would be hard pressed to figure out exactly what church they “belong” to. Where they worship. Whether they meet on Saturday OR Sunday. Or both. Try this sometime. I have. And the results are mind-blowing, I promise!


OK- I’ll digress for today. Blue will be calling soon. Besides, it's time for a cookie and some one-on-one with God anyway. The bottom line in all this hot air that I'm blowing is this...we ALL should be showing, sharing, and experiencing God's love. REAL LOVE. The last time I checked, love is still love. Look it up sometime. The Book hasn't changed. And the message is still as clear as it ever was.


“This time, we know we all can stand together”

"We gotta make ends meet before we get much older"

West Bound and Down

OK. So this morning I wake up and call in to the merchandiser hot line to find out where I'm headed today. My assumptions come true (of course) and I am eagerly awaited by the largest grocers on the west side of Cincinnati (not to mention the "thrilling" escape I get to make to Aurora, Indiana - whoopee!).

So me being the bright, strapping Georgia boy that I am...I'm thinking that I need to switch it up a little. You know, maybe change my route a little...take the road less traveled. See the sights and sounds of the great unknown. Back roads are cool when the skies are their deepest blue and a gentle breeze overcomes you. ADVENTURE, HERE I COME! (Take THAT Mr. Predictability!)

As I veer off I-275 to Kilby Road (the back way into Indiana) I long for the smell of fresh plowed fields and road kill (OK, I'm kidding). First I take a left...then another left...then a right. I'm trying to find ANY road sign saying "Yo, Mr. Cool Breeze...Indiana is THIS way!" None appear. For a long time.

By this point my palms are starting to sweat a little. Just a little. Mind you, I AM a MAN in the purest since, so there will be NO stopping for directions. My gender is just too good for that. At least in OUR own minds. If Blue were with me...well...maybe. Even though it's not too mannish.


I've driven now 45 minutes out of my way. And still I see no hope of finding the Wally World I'm supposed to service. I'm looking for signs of LIFE by this point.

Then...out of the BLUE (You KNEW I'd get at least two or three of these in, right?) it occurs to me that this pick-up truck with Indiana plates has been driving in front of me for several miles. I quickly decide that it's worth the gamble to follow him...what do I have to lose? If he's going home, at least I'll be in the right STATE! If he's not...well, maybe break one of the “man laws” and ask him which way to go.

Sure enough, about a mile down the road I cross the Indiana state line. And about two minutes later, I'm in Aurora. And there's Wally World! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!


When I got home tonight and sat down to collect my thoughts on the day, something occurred to me. The answer I was longing for was always right in front of me. It was there for miles and miles and miles. If I would have just opened up to it. A lot like the way Christ has always been right in front of me. Leading me through the unknown. Through all of my trials and tribs. Like my personal travel agent. Only with cheaper rates!


Thank You Jesus for being my tour guide. Looking back, I didn't mind it so much taking the scenic route.


"There are voices that want to be heard"

Like My Tee Shirt?

Ok. Let's get something straight. I like the way I dress. Blue likes it, so that's good enough for me. I'm TOTALLY into the tee shirt untucked/blue jeans or cargos/flip flops look. I'm comfortable that way. No maintenance, really. I mean...you can ALWAYS REWEAR your jeans, right? (Don't tell me I'm the ONLY one that does this...God's watching, you know!)


So, to further explain my taste in clothing...all of my tee's have dorky sayings on them. You know the ones I'm talking about, I'm sure. Well, I have this ONE shirt that I LOVE. As much as someone could love clothing. I LIVE the saying on it (sometimes WAY too much). It says...

Procrastinators Unite Tomorrow


Amazing!


So I put this shirt on today, and it made me think.


Do we procrastinate too often when it comes to God? Before you answer that...be truthful. I know I do. I'm man enough to admit it. Right here. For the whole world to see.


How often do you read your "sword"? How often do your knees hit the floor? Are you REALLY thankful for what you have? Me? Not nearly enough. And I'm about as broke as broke can be, I promise! LOL


Do you stop yourself from flipping off the guy on I-75 that cut you off? Or how about that man that sits on the side of the road with the hungry sign? What about the time your sibling REALLY needed you to be there, and you thought the football game was more important? The time when you "pretended" to care about what your friend had to say. There are WAY too many instances. Be TRUTHFUL. I'm hitting you right now with the cold hard facts. Right square in the mug. There are WAY too many of us out here that "claim" to walk the walk - but do we?


The Book tells us that it's OK to slip up once in a while. It's BOUND to happen, and usually does. And one of the coolest things about God, He's gonna forgive us. He's always forgiving. You gotta LOVE that, right?


Thank you Jesus! You Da Man! High Five!


Well, I'm saying right now - God, forgive me. Forgive me for slipping up. Forgive me for not holding Your standards higher. I love You. And I PROMISE that I will do better. And I will deliver (I'm a pretty good PIZZA delivery guy!), just like You delivered us! Thank you for waiting for me. Again.


Later this afternoon, after cleaning my apartment, I put on a clean tee-shirt. Boy did I need to do THAT! It says...


"as a matter of fact, the world DOES revolve around me."


And in His eyes, that shirt rings so true.


"If I see you next to never - How can we say forever?"

From Night to Day

I know. It's been a few days. I've been lost in a vast forest of topics to write upon not knowing which direction to go. I've been intimidated by the fact that I want this post to be perfect. What should I write on? Then I decided to follow my words and seek God's guidance and viola!! Here I am. It's still a work in progress, so it may take me a couple of days to put it all together, but I feel He's ready for me to begin.

You all know the story of Bryan and I now. And don't worry, I'm not gonna bore you with anymore about us for the time being. Well, maybe a little toward the end of this post but it won't be mushy. I promise. So please, just bear with me. For the last 2+ years of my life, I dated a man that was a ton of fun to be around. We had so much in common. We both loved sports; watching and participating. We both loved music and going to live concerts. We lived by the pool in the summers. He constantly made me laugh. I entered that relationship with every intention of keeping it focused on God.

He and I met online and I made it clear from the beginning that I wanted a Godly man in my life. He told me what I wanted to hear, won me over, then showed me his true self. But by then it was too late. Despite all the good things, there was a very pessimistic, glass more than half empty side to him. He said he was "jaded". He cussed all the time, had absolutely no patience (especially with my boys) and apparently had an awful way of controling me that I was aware of. He was selfish and was obsessed with anything relating to sex. The longer I stayed in that relationship, the further and further I found myself away from God. I turned my back on things that I knew to be right and instead looked to things that were wrong. I knew for over a year that I needed to be away from him but I just couldn't break free.

During that last year, we broke up probably 5 or 6 times but even during those times, we still did everything together and we always ended up back together. I was afraid of being by myself. I have no family out here in Texas. I have friends through work and softball, but I still feel very alone. I felt "secure" with him. There was a brief time last September, that I went out with someone who loved God with all his heart. I was very encouraged by him but the attraction part of it just wasn't there. The relationship never took hold and once again I ended up with my ex and back to being away from God. I was stressed. I was as low as I think I had ever been and was actually making myself sick. Litterally. I decided that after the holidays, I would begin to SLOWLY move away from him. But God had other plans.

Enter Bryan. Enter the catalyst that I needed to break free. Rather than breaking away slowly, God had me break away within a week. Very early on, Bryan expressed to me that he believed that God had a calling for him. Immediately, I felt an interest peak in my heart. Within a month, Bryan and I realized that the calling was for both of us. God took a cold and hardened heart and within one month, softened it. Filled it with joy and a desire to do His bidding. He brought it back to life. Now that it was no longer being exposed to sinful things, but rather to good and lovely things, it was able to break free of the binds that had held it closed off for far too long. God is so good.

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anthing praiseworthy ~ meditate on these things.

Philippians 4:8

In searching for the scripture to go along with my story, I found several that were pertinent. Of course. But, along the way, I also confused myself a bit and this is why I said in my first paragraph that this is a work in progress. I'll briefly explain why. God wants us to surround ourselves with all things that are good and pure. He doesn't want us to subject ourselves to things that are sinful and bad. Now the confusing part: He DOES want us to go out amongst the sinners to spread the gospel. My dilema is this: how can we keep ourselves away from the sinners and yet go out and do His work? That, my friends, is the work in progress so keep your eyes posted over the next few days. I've got more studying to do and once God reveals where He's going with this, you'll be the first to know.

Until then ~ Be blessed!

Judi Blue

Buried Treasure

God's kingdom is like a treasure hidden in a field for years and then accidentally found by a trespasser. The finder is ecstatic—what a find!—and proceeds to sell everything he owns to raise money and buy that field.
Matthew 13:44

The most remarkable transformation has happened to me in the last few months. And I know that I can become quite boring with bringing it up again and again...but it has been such a blessing to me.

From being the first guy on the block to have a CD player (circa, 1984), I was always a man of needs. I lived quite comfortably, and I had to have it all. And I wanted it now. Or sooner. I had the coolest car (which might not have been the BEST, but the COOLEST). The newest clothes. The fastest food (and I NEVER would gain weight! YAY ME!) And all of that time, I really thought I was happy. Living in excess was way cool. And I was the coolest. For most of my 40 years.

But what I didn’t recognize is, over time, my world was eroding. I was living in major family crisis. Of course the bill man came calling as well. My children became sick. I lived in constant confusion. You get the picture. My world had crashed so far, seemingly so fast. I even ended up at a point debating whether or not I should continue to live. I had hit the lowest of lows.

Then – seemingly out of the BLUE (you like that? I knew that you would!) An amazing transformation happened to me. And it was SO simple, even a caveman could do it!

I found God.

With all due respect to Joey Lawrence...WOAH!!!

What an astounding man Jesus Christ is! And all that he has done for all of us! Too COOL! WAY COOL!

He directs me everyday. Ask Blue yourself. Everyday, I make it a point to touch three people’s lives. And I NEVER let him down. Nor will I ever let Him down. That's not what I'm about.

So - back to the point. Right now, I'm not where I used to reside financially. But none of that really matters, does it? As long as I awake refreshed everyday, thank the Lord Almighty for the ability to breathe, and set out on my daily quest handed down to me from Him, I'll be just fine. Heck, it's the least I could do.




"Hey there, Mr. Blue! We're so pleased to be with You! Look around see what you do! Everybody smiles at You!"



Bryan

Lord, Bless this blog...

Our Precious Father in Heaven ~

Thank you for bringing Bryan and I together. Thank you for bringing both of us out of the pits that we were in and setting us in the direction that you would have us to go. We pray that you would lead us, Lord. Show us your path. Lay out our way with each baby step that we take. We are babes, God, and need your guidance.

Father, we believe that you have led us to this place. To this blog. We are thankful for the opportunity to do your work here. We give this blog to you and ask that you would bless it. Use this blog as a tool for your bidding. As we type the words, Father, let them not be our own but yours. Help us to always seek you first before we ever post a word. Guide our fingers across the keys as we type the words that you want to be heard.

Be with our readers, Lord. May they find Your blog to be a blessing to their hearts. Open eyes, and ears and hearts, Father, so they might receive what they need to find their way. Let the words speak directly to their hearts at a time when they may need it the most. Bless each one in whatever need they may have today and every day.

Thank you, again, Father God, for all that you have already done in our lives and continue to do. Let us not forget whose we are.

In Jesus' name we pray ~
Bryan and Blue

Mission Statement?

If I make use of the tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am like sounding brass, or a loud-tongued bell. And if I have a prophet's power, and have knowledge of all secret things; and if I have all faith, by which mountains may be moved from their place, but have not love, I am nothing. And if I give all my goods to the poor, and if I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it is of no profit to me.

Love is never tired of waiting; love is kind; love has no envy; love has no high opinion of itself, love has no pride; Love's ways are ever fair, it takes no thought for itself; it is not quickly made angry, it takes no account of evil; It takes no pleasure in wrongdoing, but has joy in what is true; Love has the power of undergoing all things, having faith in all things, hoping all things.

Though the prophet's word may come to an end, tongues come to nothing, and knowledge have no more value, love has no end.

But now we still have faith, hope, love, these three; and the greatest of these is love.


-1 Corinthians 13:1-8, 13








Perhaps it's the way she tilts her head when she talks to me. Maybe that's why. Or how she looks through me with eyes as blue as autumn mist.

Maybe it's the way she never asks me to be anyone different than who I am. She lets me be my same dorky self. Opening herself up with a heart as vast as the Texas shoreline.

OK. It HAS to be because she never has to ask how I'm feeling at any given moment. She already knows. It's confusing to me sometimes just how "in touch" with me she is. You know...answering my questions before I have the chance to say anything. Calming me before any storm. And assuring me that it's possible to really love.


You’re what my heart has been looking for – enjoying laughter in the rain again, and feeling like a fool in love! All of my happiness came back so sudden. My tears stopped falling. When I called your name, you walked in to my life and my heart discovered that things would never be the same for me again. You are my destiny! And how much joy we will share together for the rest of our days!


From the first time that I saw you so many years ago, I knew then you were the girl God sent from heaven to me, and I'm so glad He’s placed you before me now, all these years later.


And so now we are united - and together we will show the world all the wonders love can bring! Through strength, love and understanding we will stand as one in a new world that is so open to the both of us. One heart, spreading joy to everyone, and helping to take away all sorrow. Spreading blessings and peace on earth for everyone to share.

Together, we will tear down all the barriers before us, and spread peace, humility, joy and harmony. All this by helping others search their hearts. What an easy thing to do! No more sadness for God’s children!


Blue - you are my angel. My princess.


“Wouldn't you agree, baby you and me got a groovy kind of love?”



Bryan

And so it begins.

Hi! I'm Blue (Judi) and I've been charged with getting this blog up and running. Bryan has said that he was leaving the first post in my capable hands, but I'm having difficulty in deciding just where to start. So I think I'll begin almost 30 years ago.

Wow! Has it really been that long? Are WE really that old? No....it surely doesn't feel it. I just turned 20 didn't I? :) Anyway, 30 years ago this fall, I moved to a new town. I was in 6th grade and excited about making new friends. I made some wonderful, life long friends. One of them, was named was Bryan. We shared all the same friends and hung out in all the same circles all the way through high school. We even sat next to each other in Mr. Twiggs english class. Or was it Mr. Bethea's? We had a ball goofing off together! I always considered Bryan one of my best friends but once we graduated, we went our seperate ways. I ended up in Texas and he ended up in Ohio. Both a million miles away from home. We both, also, ended up divorced with 2 children.

So jump ahead to December of 2006. I had recently started a MySpace page and I kept getting this guy who wanted to join my friends list. I didn't know who he was so I kept denying him. Then out of the blue, Bryan wrote to me through Classmates.com. Turned out the guy trying to join my friends was Bryan!! LOL! So I went back to his site and checked out his pictures just to be safe and sure enough....it was him! After a couple of days posting menial messages, he left me his phone number and said to give him a call if I was ever bored. I called him that night.

(At this point, I'm going to post here, the post I made on my MySpace blog. I think it captures the emotions of the moment pretty well.)

"From the moment he said hello, it was as if not one minute had passed since the last time we had spoken. We spoke for several hours that night, and the next night, and the next night, and the next night, and....well, you get the picture. During that first phone call, Bryan confessed to me that he had had a crush on me all the way through high school but could never muster up the courage to say anything to me about it. Now, at this point in our lives, when we both were no longer married, he felt he had his opportunity and he wasn't going to let it pass by. I thank God that he didn't. We have spoken every day since that first call. Now, we webcam so that we can see each other. He has Pokemon battles with Jonathan at least once a week. He talks and listens to Joshua. He is amazing!

Then, he came to visit this week. He arrived on Sunday and I just took him to the airport a couple of hours ago. He should be landing in St. Louis any minute before flying on to Cincinnati. He arrived with a pretty firm grip on my heart, but he leaves with my heart in tow. Bryan has brought joy back into my life. Over the last few years, I have not been completely myself. For the most part, I was there. I was happy but my joy was gone...if that makes any sense at all. I am a child of God. I had strayed. I always loved God and knew He was there, but I turned my back on Him. Bryan is leading me home. Even though he was leaving this morning, I woke up with a renewed sense of who and whose I am. I sang in the shower for the first time in years. LOL!! I love to sing in the shower, but the music just hasn't been there. It's back!! And it's because God has lead Bryan into my life. And Bryan has lead me back to God. I am filled with so much joy and peace and love that I don't believe I could begin to fully convey what I'm feeling. Just know that the most amazing thing has happened and that his name is Bryan Poindexter!"

So there you go. Our beginning. Bryan and I both know deep in our hearts that God has brought us together. We both fully believe that He has a plan for us. We just don't know what that plan is yet. This blog will hopefully chronicle our relationship together as it grows and also our relationship with God as it grows. Our love is amazing. I have never felt love this deep before. It sounds cliche' but I truly only thought love like this happened in fairy tales. You know, there is even a pretty good chance that you'll think we're crazy and won't believe us. But that's ok. We're expecting that. If you don't like our story, you'll decide to never come back. But maybe, just maybe, it'll strike a chord in your heart and you'll decide to come back again and again. That's what we'll be praying for. Prayerfully, God will use this blog as a way of reaching someone who otherwise may be unreachable. Maybe that person is you.

With that, I'll end for tonight. We hope that you'll join us again real soon!!

God bless you!!

In His Love ~